Going back to what we wish for

Considering that bigger picture, many things would lose the importance they are now getting. Sometimes its equally important to look closely. We may now be yearning for a moment from the past that if granted, we won't be so happy to go back to.
A struggle that was exhilerating. A misplaced moment of joy. Missing a love we left by choice and who was at one time, very dear.
If we see what we have come through, we wouldn't ourselves want to go back.

Giving Chance a Chance

We will never know what lies in store for us unless we take our chances and explore. Invite opportunities, to consider possibilities. Open new doors. Take new steps. Create memories. Explore. Experiment. Enjoy.

Life is just this once.

On that some day

And someone shall accept us. As we come on the day destined.

All colors of life!

Going through life at a fast pace we tend to plan, predict and prepare life so custom made that we miss out on surprises. Life fails to surprise us if don't leave any space for it to do so. Prepare, but don't over prepare. Leave some scope for surprise, and who know, life might juse take you down some stunningly scenic road!

Unchain my heart!

Freedom is something that as much as given does come back. Well, unless it destroys you before you come back.

Little children have the tendency to do things that we ask them not to, out of curiosity. If you ask a child to not to go towards the stairs because he might fall, he would enjoy going in that direction. But once he falls and gets hurt, he would then be careful all by himself.

I guess its a case not with children only, but grown ups too. Only in grown ups its not that obvious. If you ask your husband to look at that pretty lady, he would not stop. But once one of these pretty girls takes advantage of him, he would hold his desires by himself, with no need for prompting.

It's just the way freedom works. Just that most of the times, it works against us. The husband might have an affair long enough to destroy your relationship. The child might get seriously injured falling off the stairs. The trick is to have freedom well balanced in life to enjoy the benefits and exploring the stairs, without falling off and hitting your head.

Think in terms of what you want

What you want is what you get in life. If you focus on the things you don't want, you would not get the things you want. In order to get what you want, you have to focus on the things you want. And because there are just so many things you can focus on, single mindedly, focussing on the things you DON'T want only leads you astray.

Think in terms of what you want.

I want health.

I want wealth.

I want to be loved.

I want to be happy.

You have to be clear about what you want, in order to get what you want. And of the things you don't want, there's less sense in highlighting.

Looking for people who understand us, we overlook the ones who do that best

We look for people who can understand us. We all do. You too must have wished for someone who could understand what you are going through. Or what really makes you happy. Or someone who knows exactly how you feel right now. Haven't you?
We often confuse companionship with love. And so we just keep looking for it in the ones we love. But every relationship has its own place. A friend is a friend. A lover is a lover. A mother is a mother. We need all of them. Even those relationships that have no name...but this post is not for them.

An elder sibling is a parent who is your own day and age. He/She understand what you need to know, What you want to know, And also, what you know and wouldn't admit. Somebody we love to miss for fighting with. Someone who always thinks we're in love with the wrong person. Somebody we like to tease, tickle and please. Someone who has seen you through the best and the worst and has been there, literally, by default.

I have some very fond memories of my brother as I'm sure many of you do (brothers or sisters). This post is dedicated to them. I miss my brother. And so I write this. Not because today is sibling day or something...

Would you?

There are so many things we fail to say. So many things that we fail to acquire. So many. And every one of us. And yet, life has a way of being so wonderful as it is. It remains forever, just that - wonderful.

Would you rather be someone else?

Just love and naught else!

Have you watched this movie called "The Eternal Sunshine Of A Spotless Mind". Its not one of the latest movies. But its nice to watch how nicely this movies shows the idea that love is really something special. You dont love just anybody with certain particular qualities that you generally admire. Its about finding that person who makes you giggle with joy. Who you miss. Who you're excited about over a long time. Over and over. Always. That is love. Its lasting. Its special.

And as the movie shows, you may erase your memory of it, but you'll still love the people you love. Today, tomorrow and always. Love is that irrespective of time and so not-particular. Thats why, its just love.

Life is about love. Not about the people we hate. Not about the people we forget. But about the people we love and can't forget. Even if we have our memories erased. Because these few people, complete us. They are parts of our lives. It may be painfull to remember sometimes, but its still unforgettable.

Multiple relationships

There are so many beautiful people in this world.

How can someone fall in love just once?

But will you marry every person you love?

Is one better than the other?

Just how did you compare?

It feels great to be in love. Its fantastic. The feeling of wanting someone so bad. We love somebody and it may not work out. We can try and wish and try and try and it may still not work out. And there's no worse feeling than being in love with someone who doesn't love you back. Love isn't about one-way traffic. Love isn't beautiful till two people make it beautiful.

But you fall in love and it doesn't work out. Do you hate that person? Unless they shoot you, no, you dont hate them. They are the one you wanted so much to be yours'. You still love them. Only want them a little less. Controllably well.

If you love someone. Its the biggest compliment you can give them. If you hate them because you found someone with who things are finally there, thats the smallest you can think. There are so many beautiful people in this world. But just so many that you fall in love with. Keep them in that special circle. "Desirable". Maybe some day when you're old and grey, you'll have the most beautiful time of your life thinking about what didn't work out in the past. It can happen. And in the meantime, life is still beautiful.

Who experiences your moods swings?

"Marge, it takes two to lie. One to lie and one to listen."
Homer Simpson

Are you impulsive?
Do your moods swings swing way faster than most people can predict?
Do people keep asking you if you're feeling ok?
Do people have a hard time being sure about what you think?
Right, you are the unpredictable moody i'm talking about. Do you realize how difficult it is to keep up with your moods? Do you understand the position of someone who is trying to be comfortable around you? Just relax will you? Control your moods for a while. It isn't all the difficult. Try? And yeah, just let people know what you're thinking. At least those who are eager to know. Please.

Subconscious Settings

Conscious, sub-conscious, super-conscious, etc. seem to be rather complicated terms as such. But it is really quite simple if we try to understand these terms. Knowing what we are doing, how, why, etc is our consciousness. Reacting naturally, and not realizing our concepts about our actions is sub-conscious behavior. Knowing not just our own but about many things beyond ourselves and realizing their interconnection and interactions is super-consciousness.

We dont always realize how a certain incident has effected our way of handling things: why and when we stop trusting or start believing. We think we are like what we have always been. But the truth is that we are as constantly changing as change can be. Every new incident, interaction, conversation and emotion, brings with it a new change in our perception of the world around us. Only when we look closely enough do we realize how people who we thought used us gave something invaluable in return which they didn't know or didn't even intend to. Value is not only what can be categorized. We like it or not. We know it or not, we change. All the time.

Those who fall...

Some people feel defeated. Sometimes everybody does. Some people take too much time to get over it. Some people never do. While some people get going quick. They move on. They take up the next challenge.

We are always told to not to stay down after falling down, but how difficult is it to practice? If you're defeated and someone tells you go to hell, you probably do. But even to those, there are few who will take criticism seriously even under stress or sorrow. That is real strength. Sometimes everybody breaks. But listen. Listen when you can't think for youself. Listen, when you dont have enough to say.

Are you all GIVE or just TAKE?

Here is a fantastic piece from The Sunday Times that i suggest you read:
A healthy give and take attitude is the basis for a steady relationship. It’s when you realise you are getting nothing in return that a partnership is in jeopardy. Every relationship charts out its own gives and takes. That’s what relationships are all about — from a tie as pure as a mother and child to one forged for business alone, give and take is an innate part of every relationship. You cannot hope to just keep taking and expect the tie to last. Even the most philanthropic amongst us wouldn’t want to spend a lifetime giving; at some point there is bound to be the concern, “What did I get out of this?” After all, even charity is doled out in the hope of raking in some returns for ourselves, be they material, physical or spiritual. Give and take isn’t necessarily a bad word. Nor is it limited to business deals. However it is certainly something that can either be elevated to a lofty status or be relegated to something demeaning and lowly, depending on people involved and intentions. Quite often we wonder what makes certain relationships tick. As an outsider you may not be able to fathom how two seemingly mismatched people are pulling along in a relationship, but rest assured, there is almost always a reason. There is equal compensation both ways. Sometimes a very strong person who has everything going for him may hook up with an ordinary partner and the world may keep wondering what he gets from her. Difficult to say, but rest assured there will always be some vulnerability in the strong person that is complemented through the partner’s personality. And, the other person accrues the obvious benefits. So the give and take works both ways. And till it keeps working, the balance keeps the relationship steady and going. It is when one partner starts feeling that he or she has nothing more to gain from the other that the relationship is in jeopardy. Once you start feeling that there are only debits in a partnership, instinctively you try and get out of the situation. It may all sound very greedy and selfcentred, but it isn’t really so. Because the give and take is not really a monetary transaction; more a compensation for what the other person needs or misses in his or her life — physical, spiritual or emotional, And yes, even if one person gives just materially, it could make for a workable relationship so long as there is mutual respect. A partner who draws spiritual solace from someone, may be giving material comforts in return. That’s fine, so long as both benefit and the relationship is symbiotic. The point is caring enough to give the other what he or she needs.Some people are very selfish and stingy when it comes to giving anything of themselves to a partner. In their shortsightedness, they attack the very foundation of a relationship. A relationship with such a person would be self-destructive. However, if not being a giver is a problem, being just a giver without ever taking anything from anyone also disturbs the balance of nature. A story in psychotherapist Brian Weiss’s book, Through Time into Healing, comes to mind. A daughter, distraught at her mother's being rendered totally inactive after a paralytic attack, questions God why he has struck helpless a woman who did nothing but give throughout her life. The answer she receives is that by giving her mother two years of dependence on the daughter, God has saved her a lifetime of begging and accepting in another birth. Because it is critical for the mother to understand it’s as important to receive as it is to give. “It is well to give when asked, but it is better to give unasked, through understanding; And to the open-handed the search for one who shall receive is joy greater than giving And is there aught you would withhold? All you have shall someday be given … See first that you yourself deserve to be a giver, and an instrument of giving.” — Kahlil Gibran

"I'm loneliest, when I'm happiest"

What is it that tells us when we end and others begin? Consciousness? Well, it is pretty freaky to think about it. Sometimes we want to be one with others, or some person. We want friends who know us inside out. Someone who knows exactly what we're feeling. People who love us like ourselves. That feeling of wholeness and belonging. And we do achieve it ever so often. But it keeps leaving us...
Why does it have to get lonely when we're so happy?
Maybe its better to reject that desire and not delve into its possibilities. Sometimes we just have to accept the things as they are. Because even if we do live forever, in which case we'll have to see dear ones die. Not so attractive. Life's good. Now. It is.

Work for work's sake

Gita says not to think of the result and just work for work's sake. Its difficult to achieve that state of mind. But what if we do achieve it. And then due to some other reason are unable to achieve what we wished. Just a single wish in life. And we aren't granted it. Or maybe we're feeling lost before we have actually? And the real reward is really hidden...and on its way, bigger than we asked for?

Everything happens for good.

Sometimes we resist the things that happen to us. Mostly, actually. The right lessons in life are passed on to us from the right people and right circumstances at the right time. Even failure in it own way contributes to our success. The resistance is only due to inertia. People fail to realize that whatever happens happens for good. There's always a right time for everything. We really are on our way to our destiny, all the time.

Like Paulo Coehlo said, "When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it."

Two ways to live a life

Happiness is mostly irrespective of pains or sorrows. Its about accepting whatever is happening to you. About being ok with the circumstances and events. Anybody with too many regrets can't achieve the peace of mind to truly feel happy. When we are focussed, so our state of mind is also not disturbed easily.
Sometimes pain temporarily blinds our way. All we really need to do is focus on what we really want and see the bigger picture. And there are all the answers.
At the end of it, no matter how we sugar coat it. The truth of the matter is, there are only two ways to live a life. When you're happy and one when you're not happy. If you're doing a lot of things and still feel miserable, my dear, you are unhappy. You need to try something new. Make it right.
Of course this is something I'm not telling you. I am telling this to myself. It may or may not help you.